Every marriage is going to encounter touchy subjects (solvable vs. perpetual) issues. Learning how to approach them for the resolution effectively is what Family Coaching, LLC can do for you.
Every couple is different, but there are some steps you can take in almost any situation to make a difficult conversation easier.
Honesty Is Always the Best Policy
Whatever the subject of the conversation may be, be clear and honest about how you feel. For example, if your partner wants to have a child but does not, don’t try and sugarcoat your responses. Be honest, or you risk building resentment between the two of you for things left unsaid.
Ask Questions and Validate Each Other
If you aren’t exactly clear about what your partner just told you, ask him or her to go into more detail or tell them how you interpret what was just said. It’s helpful for one partner to validate or restate what the initiator said. Everyone feels heard that way.
Learn How To Resolve Conflict
In some situations, neither of you will convince the other of what you want. Marriage involves a great deal of working together to find a resolution, so make sure you’re willing to meet your partner. A healthy marriage shouldn’t revolve around ultimatums. So be clear about your expectations and your partner’s. Having a mediator like a marriage counselor can be a fantastic way to reach an agreeable middle ground.
No matter how difficult a discussion may be, you’ll rarely be in a position that needs to be solved immediately. If a conversation is beginning to deteriorate or you both feel as though you aren’t making progress, take a step back. Revisit the subject once you’ve both had time to settle down and process your thoughts.
Don’t Go on the Offensive.
As a married couple, you’re a team now. Tackle every issue together—which is especially true for delicate or complicated subjects. Don’t shy away from asking for help, either. Counseling can be a great way to generate an honest, open discussion about difficult subjects. Don’t let resentments build. Your marriage will be stronger if you take the time to approach issues together.